{"id":2005,"date":"2013-11-01T08:30:36","date_gmt":"2013-11-01T08:30:36","guid":{"rendered":"http:\/\/68.183.22.105\/?p=2005"},"modified":"2023-08-02T11:19:01","modified_gmt":"2023-08-02T11:19:01","slug":"8-things-to-remember-about-forgiveness-at-work","status":"publish","type":"post","link":"https:\/\/wp-sites.ccci.org\/agapeuk-old\/8-things-to-remember-about-forgiveness-at-work\/","title":{"rendered":"8 Things to Remember About Forgiveness at Work"},"content":{"rendered":"\t\t
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Home<\/a><\/span><\/span><\/p>\t\t\t\t<\/div>\n\t\t\t\t<\/div>\n\t\t\t\t\t<\/div>\n\t\t<\/div>\n\t\t\t\t\t<\/div>\n\t\t<\/section>\n\t\t\t\t

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\n\t\t\t\t\t\t\t<\/div>\n\t\t<\/div>\n\t\t\t\t\t<\/div>\n\t\t<\/section>\n\t\t\t\t
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By Phil Jackman<\/h6>\t\t\t\t<\/div>\n\t\t\t\t<\/div>\n\t\t\t\t
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This article was first published in the Winter 2013 issue of MOVE Magazine.<\/h6>\t\t\t\t<\/div>\n\t\t\t\t<\/div>\n\t\t\t\t
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The workplace c<\/span>an be a place of\u00a0<\/span>unforgiveness<\/span>,\u00a0<\/span>eating away at our person and productivity. But it doesn\u2019t have to be like that!\u00a0\u00a0<\/span>Forgiveness is not making someone pay when we are wronged. It cancels the debt they owe us to right that wrong.\u00a0<\/span>\u00a0<\/span><\/p><\/blockquote>

For Christians, experiencing the forgiveness we have received from God is part of our journey towards offering mercy and forgiveness to others.\u00a0<\/span>But h<\/span>ow can our places of work develop a culture of forgiveness?<\/span>\u00a0<\/span>What does this look like practically?<\/span>\u00a0<\/span><\/p>\t\t\t\t\t\t\t\t<\/div>\n\t\t\t\t<\/div>\n\t\t\t\t\t<\/div>\n\t\t<\/div>\n\t\t\t\t\t<\/div>\n\t\t<\/section>\n\t\t\t\t

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\n\t\t\t\t\t\t\t\t\t\t\t\t\t\t\t\"fin-macbrayne-k_NAd4XwbKA-unsplash\"\t\t\t\t\t\t\t\t\t\t\t\t\t\t\t<\/div>\n\t\t\t\t<\/div>\n\t\t\t\t\t<\/div>\n\t\t<\/div>\n\t\t\t\t
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1. F<\/span>orgiveness does not deny the past<\/span><\/h3>

\u00a0<\/span>Forgiveness is not pretending that nothing happened.<\/span>\u00a0Canc<\/span>elling debt is<\/span>\u00a0changing our attitude to the past, so that we are no longer\u00a0<\/span>bitter or resentful.\u00a0 Then\u00a0<\/span>we can make changes in our behaviour that are best bo<\/span>th for us and for the one who has hurt us<\/span>.\u00a0<\/span>\u00a0<\/span><\/p>

2. F<\/span>orgiveness does not deny feelings<\/span><\/h3>

It<\/span>\u2019<\/span>s\u00a0<\/span>okay<\/span> to be angry. Paul writes in his letter to the Ephesian church<\/span>,<\/span>\u00a0\u201cbe angry, but don<\/span>\u2019<\/span>t miss the mark<\/span>,<\/span>\u201d (4:26) where presumably the mark is love.<\/span>\u00a0<\/span>Although we might forget an offence over time, it is important not to force it from our mind or deny its impact on us.<\/span>\u00a0<\/span><\/p>

3. F<\/span>orgiveness does not deny time<\/span><\/h3>

Forgiveness is a journey, and not\u00a0<\/span>usually\u00a0<\/span>a<\/span>\u00a0quick-fix.\u00a0<\/span>Since change takes time, whether in attitude or feelings, cancelling debt is a process. It begins with the choice not to make the other pay and ends with a feeling.\u00a0<\/span>It is<\/span>\u00a0a choice to invite change. It is other-centred. Asking someone, \u201cDo you forgive them?\u201d is not always the right question.\u00a0<\/span>At what stage of the process do you verbalise forgiveness?\u00a0<\/span>Not being able to say that you forgive does not necessarily mean that you are not\u00a0<\/span>on the journey<\/span><\/i>\u00a0<\/span>of\u00a0<\/span>forgiveness.<\/span>\u00a0<\/span><\/p>\t\t\t\t\t\t\t\t<\/div>\n\t\t\t\t<\/div>\n\t\t\t\t\t<\/div>\n\t\t<\/div>\n\t\t\t\t\t<\/div>\n\t\t<\/section>\n\t\t\t\t

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\u00a04. <\/span>Forgiveness does not deny our own short-comings<\/span><\/h3>

It is dangerous to blame others for everything rather than to take responsibility for what we have done wrong. As we work through the process of forgiving someone else, it is important to know whether we need to receive forgiveness. This requires humility.<\/span>\u00a0<\/span><\/p>

5. Forgiveness does not deny justice<\/span><\/h3>

Forgiveness should invite the person to be made right. But this only makes sense if there is agreement about the offence in the first place.\u00a0 F<\/span>orgiving a colleague for not meeting a deadline requires mutual\u00a0<\/span>agreement about that deadline. Otherwise, verbalising forgivenes<\/span>s might not go down too well. <\/span>Sometimes it is better to silently forgive if no agreement can be reached.<\/span>\u00a0<\/span>\u00a0<\/span><\/p>

6. F<\/span>orgiveness does not deny boundaries<\/span><\/h3>

Cancelling a debt<\/span>\u00a0does not mean that a relationship has to return to what it was before.\u00a0 Clearer boundaries may have to be put in place. This is not possible if we pretend that nothing has<\/span>\u00a0happened<\/span>.\u00a0<\/span>\u00a0<\/span><\/p>

7. <\/span>Forgiveness does not deny community<\/span><\/h3>

Although forgiving might let go\u00a0<\/span>of\u00a0<\/span>a (perceived) wrong, it cannot in itself restore<\/span>\u00a0a healthy working<\/span>\u00a0relationship.\u00a0<\/span>Re-building trust and developing boundaries requires work and may require help from the people around us.<\/span>\u00a0<\/span><\/p>

8. Forgiveness <\/span>can lead to<\/span>\u00a0peace<\/span>\u00a0<\/span><\/h3>

Peace is best understood by the Hebrew word\u00a0<\/span>shalom<\/span><\/i>\u00a0<\/span>as having to do with<\/span>\u00a0healthy, restful\u00a0<\/span>relationships, even if we need to work issues through within those relationships. Peace, in other words, is more than resolving conflict. It results from reconciliation, which requires that both parties\u00a0<\/span>cancel\u202fdebt, rebuild trust, and are willing to resolve conflict.<\/span>\u00a0<\/span>A\u00a0<\/span>resolution does not have to be fully reached for there to be peace<\/span>.<\/span>\u00a0<\/span><\/p>

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This article has been adapted from the Habits of the Heart course, used with permission.<\/span><\/i><\/p>

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